7 more days as a “20 something.” Ouch. This terrifies me. I know it shouldn’t. But, it does. Just being honest here.
Let me start this post with this disclaimer: I am BEYOND blessed. I am married to an amazing guy; we have a beautiful daughter, I have the absolute BEST family, and am surrounded by AMAZING friends. Mikey and I both have good jobs in careers we enjoy. We have a nice roof over our heads and can put food on our tables.
So, Caroline…what’s the problem!?!
I really think it all has to do with the anxiety I feel when I think about just HOW DAMN FAST life goes by. And of course, we are reminded all the time that for some…life is WAY TOO short, and that hurts like hell. And I think, inevitably, it is just engrained in me that the OLDER I get the closer I get to leaving this wonderful life and the less amount of time I have to enjoy it. Pretty depressing, right? I know…in all reality and hopefully more than likely, I still have MANY, MANY years left on this earth with the people that I love…but you just NEVER know. And I think that terrifies me.
Aging is inevitable, I get that. Obviously. But, it doesn’t really make it any easier. I *know* some of my absolute BEST years are ahead of me, raising my kid(s) etc. , but it doesn’t take away the fact that THIRTY LONG years have gone by in the BLINK of an eye. THIRTY. I would swear I was celebrating 21 just a couple of years ago, not NINE. So what does that mean for the next 30…will they go by even faster? Probably. And that scares me too. I try so hard to enjoy EVERY moment of EVERY day and cherish all of my time with my loved ones…but no matter what, life goes on and time slips away from us faster than I ever care to admit.
So, I am going to give myself this week to have a pity party and let it sink in that I am entering a new decade in life. Come Monday, I’ll try and have a new attitude and EXCITEMENT for THIRTY. *try being the operative word here, folks*
Ha ha. I turn 30 this year, too. EEK! Great seeing you over the weekend!
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